There are many ways you can genuinely self-care – from free options to paid services, some which can be done in 15 minutes and others which require an ongoing commitment.

Here are 25 ideas to get you started…

  1. Ask for what you need and be ok with the response
  2. Attend a spiritual circle and be supported by like-minded people
  3. Book that appointment you have been delaying and make sure you keep it
  4. Commit to gaining the support you need for an ongoing challenge
  5. Connect to your Higher Self and feel energised
  6. Consciously and slowly enjoy your favourite meal
  7. Curl up on your couch and have a nana-map with no guilt
  8. Dance to your favourite music and dare to take up space
  9. Delegate a task to someone then detach from the outcome
  10. Do a Tai Chi or Yoga class and flow with your body
  11. Do an intuitive reading for yourself and remember how amazing you are
  12. Express yourself through art and lose yourself in the process
  13. Get honest about what you’ve been tolerating for too long and make a plan to change it
  14. Have a heartfelt chat with a good friend and really allow them to SEE you
  15. Have a massage and melt into yourself
  16. Journal about anything… and everything
  17. Lay on the grass and connect to Earth and the sacredness of life
  18. Read for fun fun fun and enjoy it for its own sake
  19. Register for a course that inspires you then make sure you attend
  20. Say “no” to someone without any regret
  21. Spend a day unplugged from all of your devices
  22. Swim in the ocean and be cleansed by the energy of the waves
  23. Take a bath with magnesium salt or essential oils and forget about your to-do list
  24. Take a personal development course and see yourself with greater compassion
  25. Write a list of 7 specific things you’re grateful for right now



So many of us over-achievers believe our approach of “I can do everything myself” is a super power, instead of recognising it as our potential kryptonite.

As a big fan of self-sufficiency, I always wanted to do everything on my own. I would research, speak to friends, and implement the ideas myself. I found this was usually beneficial in addressing the top layer of my issue, and I would get some ‘relief’. But, as I finally came to understand too well, the surface is never where the truth lives. So, I would then find myself still stuck in the issue, but with the added shame of having failed (“I should have been able to do this on my own by now”).

What I eventually realised is that by approaching myself with grace (instead of judgment or shame) I can allow myself to do what is possible on my own AND acknowledge where I needed support and let myself receive it.


Getting support

There are many beliefs in our society that actively work against your true sense of equilibrium and wellbeing.

One is the idea that asking for help is a weakness… yet, how often do you help others because you can see that they’re struggling? Can you admit to yourself when you’re struggling? You may be able to fool others – and even yourself some of the time – but how about when you’re lying in bed, depleted and unravelling?

The other is the idea that if you do seek support, then you are broken and need to be ‘fixed’. This suggests a specific start and end point (like when you take your broken phone to the kiosk and then it is as good as new in one-hour) rather that acknowledging that the journey of self-awareness is a never ending one with many ups and downs.

So, let’s acknowledge that there are times in life when you need extra support by professional healthcare and related services. And then give yourself permission to receive this without shame or any sense of personal failure.

And when you do ask for support, stay present to the understanding that allowing others to help you does not absolve your self-responsibility. You still have to show up and do the work for yourself, because you are the only one who can transform your thoughts and beliefs. But you can also allow yourself to lean in to the support and let others be there for you. Because you are made to thrive in community.


Further reading:


© Artemiss Keyhani, 2021
Photo: John Hain @Pixabay

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